there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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