She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
