Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize