Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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