You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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