is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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