I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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