I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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