His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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