I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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