Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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