On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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