Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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