I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
