the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
