Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
