playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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