Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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