You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Randomize
