this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
