Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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