Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize