Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
