I love having hate sex.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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