idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize