It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
