Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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