he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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