If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
