You don't have asthma, your pregnant
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
