Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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