is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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