halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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