Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
