i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
