OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
whose ass print is on the piano?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize