What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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