Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Drake has all the answers
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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