just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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