man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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