I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
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