New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
