Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
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