I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
