dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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