i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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