you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize