Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
My ass is underappreciated
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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