my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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