Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
