Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I am mentally ready for anal.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize